What’s the best way to meet new people while traveling?
Me on the left on my first solo trip to India in 1993. I was sure that I was the first young woman of Iranian origin travelling alone—at least, that’s what I thought, and I was so fucking proud of it.
I was 22, lying in a bed in Kuala Lumpur at five o’clock in the morning, fucking scared and unable to sleep.
I had saved money for some years, left a marriage behind, and decided I was going to travel the world for a year. I had just spent three months travelling around Iran, my country of origin.
I can still remember arriving in Kuala Lumpur, in awe of the cleanliness and tidiness of that city 30 years ago.
But when I got to my hotel and lay down, the fear took over.
What the heck am I doing?
Imagining myself going to see the world all alone. So there I was, tossing and turning, trying to sleep, unable to do it, full of fear and question marks.
Finally, I had a serious conversation with myself:
Go to sleep. Tomorrow is a new day. You don’t need to decide anything now. And when you wake up, if you still want to go back home, you go home. There is no defeat. But you will see tomorrow.
The next morning, I knew I wasn’t going home.
I wanted to go to India. I had grown up watching Bollywood films in Iran, and something in me wanted to see that country for myself.
So I started walking around looking for a flight ticket. An older man stopped me and asked what I was looking for. I told him I was looking for a ticket to India. It turned out that he was of Indian origin, living in Kuala Lumpur. He helped me buy a ticket and even followed me all the way to the airport.
I arrived in Madras (now Chennai) in the middle of the night with two heavy backpacks. With those, I was definitely not a backpacker.
I don’t remember how I got to the city, but I was in a taxi asking the driver to stop wherever I could find a room.
I would go in.
Be told the hotel was full.
Come back out.
And make him drive to the next place.
And the same thing happened again, because a major conference was going on.
Eventually, at one hotel, I asked if I could just sit in the lobby until morning, and they let me. After a while, they realized they actually had a room available and offered it to me.
It was expensive, but I thought, Fuck it. I’ll take it.
The next morning, I opened the window and I still remember screaming out:
“Good morning, India.”
Then I went to the tourist information office. There I met an Englishman who told me he was going to Mahabalipuram, a small fishing village with old stone carvings.
I told him, “This is the first time I’m travelling alone, and I’m really scared. Can I follow you?”
He said yes.
And that was how my journey began.
For me, it starts with accepting that I’m scared. Staying open. Showing the right people my vulnerability. And keeping my antenna out, so I know who to ask.
I have travelled alone for 30 years now, and I still love it.
Every time I’m open, people show up. And maybe that’s not only true for travelling.
P.S. If you missed my post from yesterday about what I would ask aliens, which was a blast to write, you can check it out here!
I am Parisa Radpey, the writer of these pages and founder of Dhyana Donya Movement & Health. You can read more about me here my background.
Some patterns can’t be thought through. Only walked through. Curious what I mean? Read The Silver Route — now on Amazon.
How do I work with people? Read Free guide
I would love to understand the people I am creating this work for a little better. If you have a few minutes, take my short survey here — it truly helps me understand the needs of real people and what they face on their journey, so I can shape my work around what I hear, rather than simply assuming what might be needed.
You can also find me across social platforms, or let my Spotify playlist move what words can’t. And if you want more, I also write for Wise and Shine Zine, and my latest blog post is called Listening to the Heart: The Story Behind Lau Suna.